Since I lead a very boring life I am just going to do an update on some of the stuff that I have been rambling on about around here.
First off, Vacation!
Monk and I have been attempting to plan some sort of vacation for Feb/Mar because I now have a job that actually requires me to use 3 weeks of vacation a year, if I don’t, I lose it. So much to everyone’s chagrin, I have to start being fun and stuff. Monk gets to pick where we are going on this vacation, and even though I don’t like beaches, I told her that I would be fine (I wouldn’t bitch) with it if she wanted to head to some tropical place this time. However I did have a few things that I needed to remind her of before she started her search (these are actually quite true).
- Stay out of Mexico. I really have no need or want to visit, and just don’t want to go, same goes for Jamaica and Haiti.
- If possible stay out of the Bermuda Triangle.
- My pre-purchase activity will be googling for shark/giant squid/pirate attacks in and around the location of said tropical paradise.
I had mentioned to her that I thought Hawaii would be a great idea; however it was up to her. I looked into Tahiti and Bora Bora when she requested a bit of input, however they were a bit outside of the budget I had planned for this vacation. Monk also vetoed Nice France (too cold), Rome (too cold) and Scotland (too Scottish), however I think she stumbled across a winner last night. The 7 day cruise around Hawaii, as pictured below, is just about as perfect as it comes. Additionally it’s well below what our travel/room & boarding budget is and even includes most of our food, which I never put in the budget for stuff like this anyway.
ah HA, we come to the second thing on my list of crap to ramble on about, Smoking.
I haven’t had one single cigarette in about 11 days now. However I have eaten so much food, Sally Struthers is starting to send me hate mail (This is not true.), while Richard Simmons is slowing getting people together for an intervention (This is not true either.). My lovely wife has told me that the pills have given me some sort of bi-polar disorder, and has already told me that I owe her big when this is all over. I think I am going to get her something that rhymes with diamonds (Actually I’m going to get her diamonds, but I couldn’t think of anything that rhymes with diamonds.).
Oddly, I don’t think I have gained any weight since I am now so busy doing things that I can’t remember at the moment. I am now always on the move and have been keeping busy doing this or that. Aside from the possible bi-polar disorder, I seem to have some sort of ADD. As you can tell from the pudding post, they are stacked very neatly. What you can’t tell is that they are ordered alphabetically by flavor.
To tell you how much I really eat now, I will give you a two lists (Don’t you just love neatly ordered lists!), one regarding what I would normally eat with smoking, and without smoking.
Smoking:
- Breakfast: Nothing, generally a Caffeine Free Mt. Dew. (Caffeine Free because I don’t like putting unhealthy things in my body.)
- Lunch: Generally something like a sandwich being served in the Cafe downstairs, or a Cold Cut Combo sub from Subway.
- Dinner: What ever Monk makes, Spaghetti, Shepherds Pie, Chili, whatever. On the nights she is not home, either the leftovers, or Hot Dogs, frozen pizza etc.
Non-Smoking:
- Breakfast: A Caffeine Free Mt. Dew, two Special K breakfast bars from home, and a Snickers bar once I get to work.
- 9:00 a.m. Snack: 3 more Special K breakfast bars.
- 10:00 a.m. Snack: Since the box is half empty, lets just kill off the rest of the Special K breakfast bars.
- Lunch: Turkey sandwich from the Cafe downstairs, bag of chips, and a cookie.
- 3:00 p.m. Snack: 6″ Cold Cut Combo from Subway
- Dinner: Spaghetti, half a loaf of garlic bread, along with 1/2 a bottle of wine.
- Dessert: Pudding, 4 cups
- Right before bed snack: Pudding, 2 cups (I only eat pudding in even numbers.)
If you think that the non-smoking list of food is a bit odd, or thinking that this blogger is just making up random tasty morsels to add to the list. I want you to know something, that if you take just one thing away after reading this, it’s the fact that the non-smoking list that you just read is what I honestly ate on Tuesday. Now I just need to figure out how to write a script so that the second Moose has a new cookie contest I will be instantly notified!
Third up is the fact that my muse is seriously fucking with me.
While I have been having issues coming up with something decent to grace the front of my little corner of the Internets, I have had no trouble coming up with ideas for a new site design. I do like this one; however I want to really build something from the ground up again and with a different layout. For the last week I have been coming up with, and shooting down subjects from a writing perspective and I’ve probably made it way too hard on myself. However for some reason, I can close my eyes and come up with 19.7 million (roughly) different site designs that I like. Right now I am simply putting things that I don’t like, and the things I do like, into two piles, and then starting all over again. About the only thing that I know I want is a tag, catch phrase, slogan, or what have you. I don’t have one now, but I have been thinking about it for a while.
Personally, Schnooz’s “I am Super Important” is by far my favorite, Dooce comes up with some fantastic mastheads, but sometimes the phrases don’t do it for me. Right now I am sticking with “Nemesis for Hire” for my new site. While I currently don’t have a nemesis, I feel there may be others out there that would really want one, and for a tidy price too. They may need someone to fight against in their day to day lives and have no one who can attempt to thwart their well laid out plans. I want to be there so that I can help in these matters, kind of like the A-Team (but with less Mr. T). Of course I am totally kidding about this….or am I??
Fourth up is my love of reading and how the people are Amazon are currently on my bastards list.
Since I have decided to read 100 of the most challenged books, I have been quite happy about life in general. I have a decent reading list and will be able to fly through the winter months with book in hand, covered in a soft down blanket, dog asleep at my feet, and maybe a nice warm bowl of soup sitting on a small table nearby, just waiting for the resurrected corpse of Norman Rockwell to show up and start painting this wonderful winter scene.
But NOO, those bastards are going let you, the resurrected corpse of Norman Rockwell, and me down, because it seems they don’t just sell books anymore. Nope, they cut down the tree, make paper, print and bind the books, and then ship them to your home, once you have placed your order. We ordered 4 freaking books back in September and they are not due to arrive until November 3rd. It seems that one of the books that my wife ordered is still holding up the train (There is no actual train involved), even though we have allowed things to ship in multiple shipments. Bastards.
Since I figured out that my next round of books would not arrive soon, I have slowed my reading. I have slowed it for really two reasons, the first being that my new books are not going to arrive for some time, and the second reason is that I have found it hard to hold a book while rummaging through the fridge in search of pudding, or some other fun treat. Catcher in the Rye was one of my favorite books growing up; however I have a different point of view now. Now I would like to grab Holden Caulfield by his neck as tell him to grow the fuck up (and get off my damn lawn). It never before dawned on me how much of a whiny shithead that damn kid is. Or maybe I am just getting older and more mature. Either way the kid is a shithead.
Once I receive the email informing me that my new wonderful books have shipped, I will wrap up this book up and find a place for it on the bookshelf, update my list and get all giggly (No actual giggling will occur) about getting a package in mail.
Fifth on the list of rambling is short and has to do with the fact that I am an idiot.
You might remember that I was going to sell off all my old computer crap on eBay, and that I really needed to get around to placing the ads. Well I went through the whole pile of parts and remembered why I was selling all this crap….it’s all crap. So after spending about 40 minutes of looking this and that over, I ended up with a pile of about 6 things that I decided to keep and tossed all the rest of the stuff. I mean who would really buy a pre-2000 240×240 webcam, that I can’t be sure is even in color? Nobody would be the correct answer.
Six is about babies.
Everyone loves babies; well except people who hate babies. Which I disagree with completely, I don’t think anyone should hate. Dislike is fine, and I can even see that one as babies tend to be very unproductive, and lay around all day just sleeping and pooping. Damn, lazy babies. Anyway, speaking to other bloggers in a chat that cannot be named, someone mentioned they were uneasy about asking me about how the whole baby thing was coming along and I have to say that there is no baby at this point. We are not worrying about it, so there it’s no big deal at the moment. I suspect that we will have to go in to get tests done if nothing happens soon. Which while I kind of dread, I also in some ways look forward too because there is only really one test they give boys and I know I can pass that fucker. Additionally, it’s going to make one funny post no matter how it turns out, and will be laid out here in writing for all enjoy. and to laugh at. and you can toss in some snickering too.
Seven is where it ends, and it ends musically.
I was out of work playing hooky sick yesterday and decided that since I haven’t picked up any music in like, umm forever, I would grab a bunch of stuff. While I know that not everyone will like all of this and I may even get some laughing and finger pointing, I urge you to think about two things, one is to listen to the whole album before passing judgment, and two, don’t point, that’s really rude and you may not know where that finger has been.
- Bob Seger: Face The Promise
- Bruce Springsteen: We Shall Overcome
- Christina Aguilera: Back To Basics
- Diana Krall: From This Moment On
- Enigma: A Posterori
- Evenescence: An Open Door
- Freddie Mercury: The Very Best Of
- Hinder: Extreme Behavior
- Jet: Shine On
- John Meyer: Continuum
- Justin Timberlake: Futuresex/Lovesounds
- Meat Loaf: Bat Out Of Hell III
- Nelly Furtado: Loose
- Nickelback: All the Right Reasons
- Pink: I’m Not Dead
- Rascal Flatts: Me & My Gang
- Razorlight: Razorlight
- Red Hot Chili Peppers: Stadium Arcadium
- Snow Patrol: Eyes Open
- The Fray: How To Save A Life
- The Killers: Sam’s Town
- Weird Al Yankovic: Straight Outta Lynwood
